What's up with us all?

Discussion in 'General Discussions and Advice' started by carlosdeandrade, 30 Oct 2012.

  1. carlosdeandrade

    carlosdeandrade

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    I had a day in MASA that's been interesting, in fact I have had a few since I joined up.

    After being involved in a thread earlier today that became a bit heated, and members started getting a little upset (you can throw me in that cart of apples too:blush:), I have come to realise that we can really be a sorry bunch of reefers. There is always someone vying to be the bigger fish, the one who is never wrong, the clicks, the bosses, the know it all, the big spender, the nube, etc.

    This is no soap box speech, just a little venting, and wondering how everyone else feels, from the super mods, to the guy who has one post and is called a copepod (personally don't like the ranking system, but hey if it works....;))

    I am sure there have been other threads like this in the past, if so I apologise for this.

    I just want to fraternise with others who have a similar love for marines, who want to learn, who try hard to keep marines, who are researching the secrets of our glass boxes, no matter how much you earn, or how your system looks, or even what type of products, skimmers, pumps, additives, salts etc, you utilise.

    I accept we shall never all agree, but lets be nice, have fun, learn, teach and do these things with a humble heart, it's a privilege to keep marines and not a right, I am thankful everyday for this gift.

    Ok, so now I feel better!
    Carlos
     
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  3. leslie hempel

    leslie hempel Moderator MASA Contributor

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    Well let me start off by saying we are a reefing forum, we should stick to that. of late i have noticed alot of egos migrate onto the forum off late and we have discussed this behind the scenes and have decided to be very strict about it..

    Egos stop the forum from growing as it hinders would be new members from posting due to all the bullshit! this happens when a man continually plays the man instead of the ball!, so what happens? we wither and dwindle so a few guys can be top dog! :(

    Just a heads up: threads like this NEVER end with us all dancing in a circle around a campfire... more like eyeryone trying to throw everyone else into the campfire...:tt2:

    but i will leave it run and lets keep it civil!
     
  4. Albert Terego

    Albert Terego

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    It's a real pity when threads that encourage debate are deleted. There was a lot of information there that could have been of benefit to other reefers, that now have no real opportunity to learn from that.

    So be it but I did not think this site needs to treat adults like kids - especially when all requests for information were reasonable.
     
  5. carlosdeandrade

    carlosdeandrade Thread Starter

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    :lol:With you on this one, so I am putting the matches away!
     
  6. leslie hempel

    leslie hempel Moderator MASA Contributor

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    clinton, i temporarily deleted the thread because it was a mess, so tomorrow when i get 5 minutes and i dont have my kids crawling all over me i will try split it into 2 threads, i agree there is alot of valuable info there...

    thanks for the suggestion;)
     
  7. 459b

    459b Moderator MASA Contributor

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    With so many people participating on the forum there are bound to be conflicting personalities. Unfortunately it's not always possible to gauge the type of person who's post you responding too, so toes do often get stepped on. Sometimes it is better to step back for a while and take a deep breath before letting emotions take over.
     
  8. Marine007

    Marine007

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    :confused1: Seems I missed a live one!

    My 2 cents - I love this forum and everyone on it. Its a family and everyone doesn't always see eye to eye, but it is almost always entertaining, insightful and helpful!
     
  9. Albert Terego

    Albert Terego

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    OK that's cool then - the thread did need a clean-up.

    Is there no way, if there are cases like this in future, that the thread can just be closed but still readable - rather than removing it from the forum completely?
     
  10. leslie hempel

    leslie hempel Moderator MASA Contributor

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    i have no problem with a good debate i encourage it, present your facts as what was done earlier today, but keep it civil.. there is no place for rudeness or childish behaviour here.. thats where i have to step in and as a polite warning the mods have been given carte blanche to ban repeated offenders as it contributes negitivley to all..

    i dont want people to walk on eggshells during a debate but i dont want newbies to refrain from participation either...

    civility is the key;)
     
  11. dallasg

    dallasg Moderator MASA Contributor

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    I agree, ego is the killer

    The thread will be back tomorrow but I wanted all the stupid posts deleted and good info kept
    I am a reefer and hobbyist only :) so I am all about sharing info hence being a huge open source advocate

    Lets keep posting
     
  12. leslie hempel

    leslie hempel Moderator MASA Contributor

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    could be done, i must be honest i got so muddled up trying to figure out which went where none of it made sence when i started to try move sections of it into its relevant section..

    and i had a crappy day so just put it on hold for next time.. but we can definatley look at doing that in future...
     
  13. DeanT

    DeanT Dean

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    just picking this up now , but maybe introduce a way to report posts that are offensive and then delete these posts
    This will stop the thread from becoming an ego throwing war of words and still show peoples posts who are civil and allow them to carry on with the discussion
     
  14. RiaanP

    RiaanP Moderator

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    Remember, every reefer's system is his pride and glory. Sometimes its difficult to help somebody, without sounding offensive. And some guys feels immediately directly offended when something is pointed out. Nothing wrong with your pride and glory. You spend a lot of time and money on your salt water container.

    Same as telling a lady that her son needs some communication skills improvement therapy. But what you are actually thinking is that he is a spoiled unmannered brat. To say things nicely, is a lot easier than trying to type things nicely (well sometimes....)

    When giving advise, always say why B is better than A in your opinion. Justify yourself.

    When receiving advise, always remember that the other person took out a few minutes of his life to try and help you. He got nothing to gain, maybe never even meet you. He is just as passionate about this hobby than you, maybe more, maybe less. Maybe he got loads of experience. Maybe he is a newby that learned at least one thing and wants to share that with you. So do not take offence that easily. Sit back, reread, try to understand why something is said. Take the good out of it. And use it for your own gain.

    After all, this forum is about getting help with your marine system.
     
  15. pXius

    pXius

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    Little red triangle at the bottom left of every post ;)
     
  16. viper357

    viper357 Admin MASA Contributor

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    The site doesn't treat everyone like kids, only the people that act like kids will get the same treatment in return. If someone comes on to a thread and acts like a 5 year old by doing things like posting stupid facepalm photo's then they will get treated as such. Act responsibly and not like a keyboard jockey and it will be surprising to see how much further we will get.;)
    If we delete posts we get shouted at, if we don't delete posts we still get shouted at. :lol: Instead people need to learn to conduct themselves correctly on the forum then there won't be any need to go around deleting posts and banning people. :)

    Carlos is spot on though, and it's starting to get really annoying having to deal with so much crap on the forum, so much so that there is going to come a time where we are going to be left with no option but to get heavy handed on the ban button, why? because it's the only course of action we have that seems to work unfortunately, verbal warnings don't work, so it's going to come down to either behave or be banned, nothing inbetween, because it is really ruining things for everybody else, we're supposed to be enjoying this hobby, not fighting and being rude all the time, why is it when there is a meeting that everybody gets on so well together, but on the forum it's a different story???
     
  17. Tremayn

    Tremayn

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    Ive missed soo much lol. Which thread was this?... I learnt to just let people do what they want. I only give advice to those who ask. Most of the time noobs with too much of money dont want to hear that they are killing their live stock :)
     
  18. Marine007

    Marine007

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    Ouch - I think all noobs who come here (whether they have deep pockets or not), want advice on how to best take care of their live stock. I know I do...
    Especially if the expert explains why we are harming the livestock and suggest an alternative. That's how we learn...
     
  19. naptalene

    naptalene

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    Because they might punch you lol.
    Forums have 2 main problems IMHO. Anyone can say anything and hopefully you as the reader can filter out the crap.
    Then the other problem is you don't hear the person's tone. Guy 1 might be making a comment but guy 2 reads it with a different tone in his head and BOOM, flame war.

    I know my writing style is terrible and often gets misunderstood, so I actually avoid posting. I always preferred this forum because of the friendliness so hopefully it can stay that way

    Out.
     
  20. Gesiggie

    Gesiggie Challenge accepted

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    Time to give my 2c
    I do believe that there is a lot of knowledgeable people on this forum who can add a lot of value.

    However, as mentioned by few others previously, one can sometimes take their remarks as quite offending, or (especially if you do not know them personally) find them very rude.

    (Know a couple of people personally, and sometimes when I read their posts, I can just mentally picture the box of popcorn coming out;), although I do know that they really mean no offence...)

    It would also be of benefit that we should get to know people better, know where their fields of expertees lie, what their proffession is, ( lawyers and programmers tell it like it is, moms and nurses tend to sugar coat things better). This could help us understand where their questions / answers come from. I, for one, will always try to state my reasons for saying things, be it based on fact, experience or opinion. Unfortunately, opinions get shot down very quickly, as (as previous posts state) we care too much about our egos, not willing to stop and think before we respond.

    As a reefing community, we have one thing in common, a passion for marines, wanting to give our little pieces of ocean the best that we can offer.
    So when you receive a funny answer next time, try to take the emotion from it, learn what you can, discard what you do not feel is appliccable. Use it, or not. But we are all in it because of our one big passion.

    We all have enough issues at work / home/ school/ wherever... We do not need to take our issues out to the one community who only want to extend a helping hand.... Don't do like my clowns... 'Bite the hand that feed you" this forum should stay friendly, without the mods cursing us in the background, trying to figgure out what to delete, whom to ban, etc... This is not a creche, it is an adult forum that warrants respect towards each other, thinking before responding. As my one lecturer once told me " read 3 times, think about it 2 times, write once..." If we can just TRY to stick to that, the world will be such a happy place:)

    And now I shall keep quiet....my Ipad battery is about to die... ;)
     
    Last edited: 30 Oct 2012
  21. Ebi Omer

    Ebi Omer

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    I was reading the thread this morning, when i got busy and could not completely read all the posts.

    However, the posts were quite an interesting read and quite valuable for a beginner like myself.

    Few important points were made and I was hoping to come home and read the rest of what was said. I assume it just got too heated thereafter..
     
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