The Value of a Drink

Discussion in 'The Sump' started by chikaboo, 29 Jun 2009.

  1. chikaboo


    Posts: 4,979
    2 Jan 2009
    Likes Received:
    Newcastle - KZN

    The Value of a Drink
    "Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink,I feel shame.
    Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams.
    If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dream s would be shattered..
    Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
    ~ Jack Handy

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell
    happened to your bra and panties.
    "I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they
    wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're
    going to feel all day. "
    ~Frank Sinatra

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
    "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
    ~ Henny Youngman

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
    "24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not."
    ~ Stephen Wright

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
    "When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk,
    we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
    When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all
    get drunk and go to heaven!"
    ~ Brian O'Rourke

    WARNING: Th e consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
    "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~ Benjamin Franklin

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
    "Without question, the greatest invention in the
    history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the
    wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does
    not go nearly as well with pizza."
    ~ Dave Barry

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
    To some it 's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can!
    ~Dave Howell
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